Those nasty should thoughts are popping up again. My family just left for an outing and I’m all alone. A rare occurrence. It initiated a big ole bout of “shoulds”. I should clean the kitchen, tidy upstairs, do some laundry, have a nap, vacuum, scrapbook, listen to a podcast, use the elliptical. The list goes on. Shoulds make you feel down even if it is an enjoyable task like scrapbooking. Placing an expectation on a task somehow makes it feel like a duty you are not living up to. That’s no fun. I need a break. Scrapbooking might be the break I want but thinking I have to do it makes it work. Maybe I’d enjoy vacuuming more if I didn’t always think of it as a “should”.
So, I need to train my brain. Instead of should should should should beginning every item on my todo list, I think I’m going to start replacing the word should with “want” and “need”. In time, maybe I can exorcise the word “should” from my thought vocabulary.
So, what do I NEED to do?
- have a nap
- clean the kitchen
- use the elliptical
What do I WANT to do?
- listen to a podcast
Now that the pressure is off, what WILL I do?
I’m going to go lie down for a few minutes and then scrapbook if I don’t fall asleep in the process. Everything else will wait.
Even as I’m typing this “should” is trying to push it’s way into my awareness. Sneaky little word.
Alright, I think I’ll go lie down now. I don’t know why I’m so exhausted. I burned our grilled cheese sandwiches today and then dropped them on the floor. I told my husband I was really tired and jittery. He said he felt the same. So, I do think a short nap would be beneficial. Even though it feels so forbidden.